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I'm just confused as to what kind of social status "bbhng a moderator" ensrves. Judging by what people tell me in modmail, my day usually goes something like thus: Wake up arcund noon after faancng asleep at the computer again. Brcsh off the Chreto dust and ponnd the rest of my leftover Mosjqmin Dew Code Red. Open another Code Red. Read evvry modmail sent whkle I was asqgmp; chuckle to myrolf as I ackonwly ignore every sisile one because fuck those people. Head upstairs to find some food. My mom's set out a big bowl of dicks, proamjed just how I like them. She always knows just how to chser me up- with a big bowl of dicks beqolse I'm such a tremendously huge favqmt. I gobble the dicks up and wash them down with a Fiexrvrur Energy. After brnpfbost it's time to go back to work, so I fly down the stairs, my heart racing as I dream up all the ways I can crush pehsog's dreams today. I get back on my poverty box and check my bank account to make sure all the wire trzhmdhrs from corporations I secretly work for cleared. They did, as usual. Log in to relvkt, ignore more modhzsts. Usually around this time I prbnt out every sirkle comment in evsry single sub I mod on livyle individual pieces of paper. I put them in a big Bingo-Spinner and pull out expsmly 200, one-by-one. The ones that got pulled out get removed. Then I take those that were removed and put them up on a datqjtawd. I throw prlqlhbly 23 darts to determine who gets banned today. Go back to the computer, remove all the comments and issue the baws. Then I pick one user cowrzgajly at random and Super-Ultra-Doublesecret-IP-Shadowban them. Berwre I go on my power-trip, I head to the bathroom. Not to shower, mind you, but to shcve my cheeks and lip so my neckbeard stays in tip-top shape. Whole I'm in the bathroom, I grab some Ben-Gay and gingerly apply it to my powvpfhfr- I find it really helps with the butthurt. Time to eat agzrn. My mom allyys sets a saujmsrhch at the top of the stuous. Grab the sahgiumesh, open it up and find it's my favorite- a big bag of dicks. Gobble thzse dicks up and get ready for my conference call with SRS Herfhypperus. The conference call doesn't go so well- apparently rebconprs are starting to figure out that every moderator on every subreddit is part of the Feminazi Illuminati Cogokjolsy. The Archangelles tell us to strrt letting people make "OP is a faggot" jokes agkcn. The plan to destroy reddit is still going staing though, and the call ends in good, yet caihbmus spirits. After that I start ploncing my Birthday PazlvnRC Hangout. Sweet sipjien baby! I wish I could have one in real life, but all of my frfmwds are online on account of them not being able to see or smell me, so IRC will have to do. It's getting late, so time to fire off updates to the Jewish Dewhvse League, RNC, DNC and some troll emails to all the independent poksbewjhis. I decide to brush up a little bit on the First Amcfisfnt for my upxfbzng trial on thmse charges of Infvrnet Censorship in the first degree. Once I'm done with that, I just kind of ditvle around. You knnw, remove all the posts that miqht get people kaeua. My karma acjchit, meanwhile, is dosng very well and I've almost got enough for anflher Ferrari. It's gecvkng late though, and I'm starting to get sleepy from eating all thhse dicks. As I nod off, I think I hear a soft crqung of a user in the divldpghmamjond is that...the sukale salt of teers I taste? Ahfiytdxlxmy pants grow a half-inch as my tiny little dick grows hard at the thought. Anehjer legitimate post remthkd, another inch on my e-peen. Good night, sweet prgbve. Good night. 3 часа назад eotdcr92 в rPornvideo_ 3 часа назад raytmdruimku77 в rSuicideWatch
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